PrintGet out the box of tissues and watch this young man on China’s Got Talent. He lost his arms at the age of ten after being accidentally electrocuted while playing with a friend. After overcoming his initial depression, he formulated a philosophy for his life that is sure to take him to unimaginable heights. We all have many challenges in our lives, and there is no person who has it easy, regardless of how things may appear on the outside. Thing is, there is no stopping a person with a goal, a drive, a positive outlook, and the willingness to put the work in, no matter what. In the case of this young man, the loss of his arms compelled him to learn to do everything with his feet – including playing the piano. Watch this true champion of life and get inspired. Often, what at first seems like an obstacle, if looked a properly, is really the beginning of an opportunity.
Posts Tagged adversity
This week I took my seven year old son to the skateboard shop and set him up with all the gear. Board, helmet, wrist guards, elbow pads and knee pads. He felt like such a big boy with his cool new gear. He even got some cool new skateboarding sneakers to top it off.
Since skateboards and skate gear aren’t meant to be looked at the next evening was a trip to the skate park where the big boys play.
When we got there he ran right in and got on his new board. I just stood there for a minute in amazement watching skateboards, bmx bikes, scooters, and a unicycle whizzing by at lightning speeds, with wiry, muscular young men jumping, flipping twisting, turning, and flying on them.
I thought, “Ok – deep breath, he’ll survive”. As for my son, he was off exploring the park, completely unaffected by what was going on all around him.
The first time he fell off his ‘big boy board’ I thought – ok he’s gonna fall, its part of learning. By the 10th I thought – wow, he is pretty tough, and he is not giving up. By the 15th or 20th time he fell, the older guys were starting to notice him and say things like “Man that kid has b*lls!” Eventually he was able to manage small ramps, then bigger ones, then he went for a serious one. He got some coaching from experienced skaters and I watched and held my breath.
He stood for a minute, then dropped in and sure enough – wiped out, smacked his face on the ramp and came up with a bloody lip. He popped up and said “I’m ok!” And got right back on his board.
Despite my private little minor coronary, he taught us all a very valuable lesson that day. No matter how many times you fall off your board, ignore the minor scrapes and bruises, and get right back on and ride. Life is just like that, and the only failure is to not get back on your board and try again.
By the way, we went back two days later, and after a few more falls and face plants, he was able to drop in on and ride the big boy half pipe – harder than what he had busted his face on two days earlier.
Update: While I don’t have that really nasty spill, here is some footage I took on my blackberry of the boy’s first and second day on his skateboard. I appreciate your comments.
Photo: taliesin from morguefile.com
Suicide and Choice
Apr 23
On Monday morning I was in the West Palm Beach airport, heading back to New Jersey, returning from a family gathering. To pass the time I was in one of the gift shops with my kids, and noticed the People magazine issue with Phoebe Prince on the front.
If you are not familiar with the story she is the South Hadley High School teen who killed herself after being victimized, hazed, bullied, and allegedly raped, by her fellow students. She was an attractive, bubbly 15 year old, who was a new student in the school, and had recently come over to the U.S. from Ireland. She was found hanging in the stairwell of her apartment by her 12 year old sister. I hate to be so graphic, but the fact of the matter is that many lives were permanently altered due to this tragic incident.
The cover story caught my eye, and I bought the magazine. In reading the story, all I could think of was how differently different individuals react to the same stimulus. Where one person cowers, the other stands up for themselves. As a young person, I was very small (103 pounds my sophomore year of high school), and of course faced my share of bullying. Through my training in the martial arts, I developed a certain level of self confidence, and learned to stand up for myself.
To be honest, I can’t imagine how my life would be had I not been training in the martial arts for so many years. It also occurred to me how differently Phoebe’s life, and the life of her family might also be had she developed the self-confidence to stand up for herself, or at least interpret the actions of her classmates in a different way. I don’t mean to sound like a Monday morning quarterback, but as a parent, it is hard not to be sickened over such an incident, and replay it in one’s mind.
In nature, animals attack weakness, or perceived weakness. High school is not much different. Kids attack what they view as weakness, and the more the victim reinforces that weakness the more attacks will follow. I am not suggesting shooting down the school, as in Columbine – that is also not real strength. I am suggesting developing real self-esteem, and real self-confidence in a supportive environment. My philosophy is that whoever cares less in an argument wins. The bigger your reaction to a slight or an insult, the weaker you appear, and the more you entertain your attacker. The less an insult means to you, the less power you give your insulter.
While we cannot change the past, we can learn from it, and improve the future. My suggestion to anyone reading is that you focus on your own self-improvement, and on contributing something of value to the lives of others. Each of us is here for a purpose. I don’t know what that purpose is for everyone, and many don’t know what it is for themselves. That doesn’t mean we stop looking for it, or that it can’t change several times in a person’s life. The point is, when you are focused on your life’s work, what others say or think of you is less significant, than what you know you are accomplishing with your time in this planet. One thing we can do is give meaning to Phoebe Prince’s life, and her death, by choosing to be empowered in our own lives.
My mission is to become a “black belt in life”, and to help others to do the same. I encourage people to choose activities (like martial arts) that are empowering, and that help you face the daily pressures of life with energy, enthusiasm, and confidence. There are always going to be mean people out there, but you don’t have to let them dictate the way you live your life. Focus on your own walk and your own growth. The way people behave towards you is more a reflection of them than you. Remember, you can’t change other people, but you can change yourself. When you do, the way people react to you will change as well.
It has been said many times, but never more appropriately than here: In life it is not so much what happens to you, but how you respond to it that counts. I might add a thought I read in Victor Frankl’s ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’; (paraphrasing) the one dignity that can never be taken from you is your ability to choose how you will respond to the circumstances that surround you, and to assign meaning to the events of your life. It is entirely up to you to assign a meaning that is empowering, and not debilitating.
I would love to hear from you.
Photo: People Magazine
Like Theodore Roosevelt has said, “Do the best you can with what you have where you are.”
Check out the article (and video in the Related Media box) about Charlene Lerner, who has decided to keep shooting.
Photo: Jared Zwerling
The Shoe Rack Theory
May 19
It has long been a custom in the Martial Arts, that upon entering the dojo, students remove their shoes and place them in the shoe rack. Part of this custom is for hygiene and cleanliness. A clean dojo and well kept dojo is certainly better than a dirty one.
Even better is a philosophy called the “Shoe Rack Theory”
Students remove their shoes and place them in the shoe rack for a more purposeful reason. They are also placing all of life challenges and any stressful thoughts or negative issues from their day, in their shoes before entering the mat.
This allows you to give yourself fully to your training.
Mentally… physically… and emotionally then after a great class;
you will be able to better deal with any of the challenges
placed in your shoes before class.
Sometimes, you actually may find they’ve disappeared all together…
Meaning that after a great workout and practice session, you have relieved yourself of all the stress you had before your class and/or relieved yourself from any negativity.
Martial Arts training is proven to be an outstanding way to relieve stress and cleanse your mind, body and spirit of any negativity.
If you practice this philosophy every time you enter the dojo, you will find yourself in a better mood and you will also enjoy greater benefit from your Martial Arts training.
This philosophy can also be applied to walking into your own home…
… Mentally, leaving all stress and challenges in your shoes upon entering
so you can enjoy quality time with your family and loved ones.
One way you can maximize the benefits of your Martial Arts training is to practice and apply the philosophies you learn in class to your everyday life outside the dojo.
Everyday I train is a great day… which is why I train everyday!
I’ve been an insulin-dependent diabetic for over 30 years. The journey has been a rollercoaster ride of ups and downs, and through it I have learned that sometimes adversity is our greatest teacher. By viewing adversity as opportunity, people can discover their true selves and reach their full potential in life. My name is Joel A Levy. I am a teacher, a mentor, and a coach.
As a lifetime martial artist, I simply can not imagine my life without the martial arts. I have always loved martial arts, even before I began to study it. I even remember the first book I ever bought on martial arts. I got it at my first grade book fair in the early 1970’s. Today I hold several ranks in the martial arts, and have been inducted into several Martial Arts Halls of Fame. I am a recognized Grandmaster of Kickboxing, American Freestyle Karate, and of Continuous Full Contact Karate. I also hold the rank of 6th Degree Black Belt in the Superfoot System under living legend, Bill ‘Superfoot’ Wallace. In addition, I am an internationally certified Executive Protection Specialist, and an instructor at a top bodyguard training camp.
At the peak of my athleticism at the age of 27, due to severe diabetic retinopathy, I became blind in my left eye. This was a gradual process, which involved 18 laser surgeries, three vitrectomies to attempt to reattach a detached retina that just didn’t want to stay on, and one cataract surgery, just as a bonus. My physical prowess, and everything that I had worked for had become severely compromised. Because I could no longer see things coming from my left, I could no longer compete in the martial arts at the level to which I was accustomed. My whole world changed. I literally felt that without the martial arts I was going to die. I had to figure out a way to stay involved.
By that time in my life I had already earned a Masters Degree in education. I was a teacher in the New Jersey public school system. In the midst of my frustration over what I believed I had lost, suddenly my focus changed and I realized what I had gained. It was then that my ‘true self’ revealed itself to me. I realized that I was born to teach, mentor and coach others. I understood that for me, the expertise I had gained in the martial arts was only the preparation for what was to really be my path. I decided to open a martial arts school, and pass on what I had learned to others.
From that point forward all of my training and everything that I continued to develop on my own was no longer about me. It was about making my students live up to their own potential, and hopefully become better than me. I began thinking of ways to present information and material differently. I wasn’t just going to teach the way I was taught. I decided that I would continuously innovate new and creative ways to help my students become successful, and to show them the unlimited potential they had inside.
What I didn’t realize when I first opened my school was that it would be so much more than teaching physical skill. My new role, so much more important than being a competitive martial artist, was to be a Life-Coach to others. Martial Arts just happened to be a great vehicle.
There’s an expression in Japanese that kind of puts it in perspective. It states that a Sensei is a thousand fathers. It made me realize that I would become a Coach and a Mentor to many. In that role, I would teach that the martial arts aren’t just about technique, but the quality of your character. I knew I had the opportunity to have a positive impact on people’s lives. To help them discover their true selves and reach their true potential through their training.
After the doctors told me that my left eye would be permanently blind, and that I could no longer participate in any contact sports, I went through various stages of anger, and depression. When I was done feeling sorry for myself, I realized that to go forward, I had to find the advantage in my adversity. As soon as I began to search for what was good about my situation, I realized that if I just shifted my focus, I could pour all of my energy into teaching and do it my own way. Essentially I had to allow myself to die as an athlete in order to be completely reborn as a coach. The best part about doing that was, I knew that my gloves were hung up for good, so there was nothing more to prove. My new focus was to help as many other people as possible become the best that they could be through ongoing training in my academy. Deep inside, I knew that I could train other martial artists to be better than I was, and even better than I may have been. That became my new focus, and my new passion.
Make no mistake about it, adversity will come in everyone’s life. When viewed in the right perspective, this is often the turning point where people discover their true calling. For that transformation to take place, one has to decide that adversity equals opportunity. As strange as it may seem, to recognize that opportunity, one must be genuinely grateful for the adversity, with full faith that opportunity will appear.
Once you discover who you really are, and what your unique purpose is, you are ready to begin. Your job is to develop yourself to the best of your ability in the thing that you love to do and for which you are naturally inclined. That thing can become your particular area of genius, because nobody will do it quite like you.
To complete the circle, you must now use this talent in the form of useful service to others. If you are as lucky as I am, or make the conscious choice to do so, you can even make your living at it. The greatest thing is that through helping others, you will continuously improve yourself.